But to every marriage, both couples are meant to go through many marital challenges together in times of insufficiency, financial and moral misunderstandings, daily individual life challenges as well as external pressures from family and friends.
But in all these, divisions and separations must be set aside for the purpose of love shared, and reconciliation must become a norm after each misunderstandings some few minutes after (I mean almost immediately after each quarrels), since they are not brought up from the same background but different families.
Mostly, as the head of the home, the man have a lot of responsibilities to take and assume for a longer and happy marriage between the two couples.
As a woman who wants a healthy and a happy home, there are 5 things you need to look up to in a man during your courtship, and these five things can indicate to you if he is the right man for you or otherwise, and these are:
1. If he jokingly hits you
A lot of ladies misunderstood this as a joke but rather, in the long run in that relationship or courtship, this may materialized as true.
Such a man may automatically turn out to have a tendency of bartering or beating up a woman at any given point, where quarrels erupts and vigorous conversations made among the two.
To every good man, the possibilities of hitting a woman with his hand, object or otherwise should be out of joke. No good man raise his hands to hit a woman who portrays no harm to him but showing what she feels from her mind, which in most cases is a show of care, concern and love to the man, who she loves so much.
So ladies, if your man to-be is showing this signs during a playful mood, then he may likely not be yours in that to-be union.
2. If he is an addict in sports betting
A lot of ladies doesn’t really have time of taking note of their man if he smokes, drinks, makes bad friends and even if he is a sports loving man or just a soccer addicted man.
By this, I mean a sports loving man only has the interest of watching various sports activities both as visuals or as a live event, but, not at the expense of the love he is sharing with you, while a soccer addicted man may have an additional interest in soccer sport or other sporting events.
For instance, a Liverpool or Chelsea addicted fan may go as far as betting (Placing money value on the outcome of a game) on his team to win at any cost. Though, this is not applicable to all soccer addicted man. But, if a woman is in a relationship with such a man, there are higher possibilities that he may give little time to her in exchange to the time he may spend with his sport addicted lifestyle.
As such, this is a pointer to note and enquire if his addictions to sporting events also involved sports bettings, as his desires may becomes more acquainted to the outcomes of games and it’s financial outcomes which he has always made, than having a good financial plans for you in the long run, and this will always drain his finance due to this addiction.
So Ladies, if you get to know that your man is greatly into sports betting try within you to discourage him uniquely to put a stop to it by discussing with him vigorously everytime.
But in the long run, if you still discover he is showing no remorse to this addiction, then the decision is left to you if you should go ahead with the relationship or not, as this is important to your well being financially in such a union to-be.
3. If his parents and family obliged and give full consent of your relationship or marriage with him
A lot of ladies doesn’t understand how this works but only assumed that “As long as I love him” I will marry him, but logically, doesn’t know that as long as you are married to him you’re also married to his family as well.
In Africa, and in most Nigerian cultures, He (the husband) still belongs to his family while you the wife doesn’t belongs to your own family anymore but rather belongs to another family once your bride price has been made during your marriage to him. Automatically, you are only “Our wife” to them while he still remains their son everytime.
This is what many ladies find difficult to do while in a relationship with a man, to know his family, I mean, get to be respectful to all his extended family members (if he is from a polygamous family), be good and cheerful to them, love them as well as getting along really well with his siblings (his Sister and brothers) and his core families, and not to leave out his parents as well.
Ladies, please consider this while making your choice for you not to be having many wrestling and boxing bouts which holds no championship belt with your mother in-law anytime she visits his son’s home.
4. You must learn how to cook and do many household chore yourself
Nowadays, what many ladies have learnt is how to be fashionable, looks good and going digital to get their personal needs done, but also forgets to learn how to prepare a good meal comfortably without looking and searching through magazines for cooking tips to prepare a Standard AFrican cuisines for her dream man.
Some ladies are fond of luring their man to fast foods outlets or eateries for either outings, for breakfast or lunch in most times during their courtship, as against showing their cooking skills to him and discourage him from unneccesary spendings.
Foods such as his favorites among many should be known since you share so much love and bondings together; this should be noted.
In your relationship with him, try to learn how to prepare local delicacies he loves so much, even if it will take you almost the time you may spent in the Saloon fixing your long braided hair and nails; as he is your superman, the special one and the love of your life.
So, Please ladies, no more Noodles and Egg (Which only takes 15 minutes to prepare) for him everytime, no more extra spendings on Shawarma, Asun, Suya, Pies, Doughnuts and so on for his lunch. Prepare a Nourished Pounded Yam/Wheat meal with Vegetable Soup garnished in assorted meat and fresh fish with carefully selected fruit juice to refresh, Jollof Rice with stewed chicken/turkey/fried meat, as well as his other favorite meals which only you knows, since you truly love him.
If after all these sacrifices and complements you’ve done and he still makes preferences to an unhealthy eating habits, then he might be an unappreciative husband to be, since you’ve done all you could, but to no avail.
5. If he is very patient, overlooking and forgiving, but hardworking as well.
Ladies, this is the most delicate part of this article, a lot of men doesn’t have these 4 qualities in them, but may still have a traces of these in their behaviors, as all men have their different ideas and understandings towards a relationship.
Best to know all these in a man, is when you purposely hurts him to know if truly he possesses these qualities and to know if he truly loves you.
A good man that loves you will always protect his love for you at any cost by taking many sacrifices including telling you “I’m sorry” when you are not sure within yourself if you have done wrong to him or not, accommodating and overlooking your wrong doings everytime, When he doesn’t have, but still find ways to provide for you, when you’re in emotional and mental needs and still supports you with many good encouraging words and of all, he is extra hard working to support your living emotionally, spiritually and financially (According to his financial strength).
If you noticed all these mentioned from a man please give him a chance ladies, love him fully, cherish him, get a hold of him griply and do not take him as ordinary, pray for him and also pray over it, as he is no doubt a good man you may want to spend the rest if your life with.
They are good reasons you should try bear at the back of your mind, please note them, do not take them for granted, as they are very vital to you towards having a good relationship with a good man of your choice, and of all, a longer blissful marriage free of crisis and misunderstandings.